A Year Ago...

One year ago I decided I would write about the building of this family-- not just in terms of being newlyweds still drunk on love-- who were running down new careers during a hostile economic environment-- while I was finding balance and fitting in as a new stepdad to the Littlest Buddy-- while we were still searching for answers to his developmental delays wishing so hard for him to finally speak-- while I was weighing out if we all had the endurance to face the uphill battles and constant rejection from my decision to try and make it as a professional writer and photographer-- or if I should just finally put the dreams up on the shelf and find some 9-5 thing that would offer more security-- while we finally decided that despite all of the uncertainty, we both wanted a baby very badly, we wanted LB to have a brother or a sister before he got much older, and so we set out to make this happen. And I decided to write about it. All of it. With no real idea of the blog world. I just asked Cole if I could write about everything, because if she was even a little squeamish about it, I wouldn't have wanted to do it. Not for a second. Her willingness to be open and share our life motivated me to write every day. In the beginning she was my only audience. She was my readership.

I have been doing this for one year now. This time last year we had no idea that a little Tessa Tangerine had already started to grow inside of Cole. We had no idea that we had already made a baby when I sat down to start chronicling the process. I certainly had no idea that a year later I would look back and realize that thousands of people took this journey with us, and saw this family grow along the way. It's hard to wrap my head around what we have done in a year, and in front of so many people. I think the shock of that has kept me quiet these past few weeks. People tend to throw around the term "it blew my mind" but I actually think my mind is a little more than blown, to the point that it isn't thinking the same way any longer. In the end I wanted to do right by my family and stick to a promise I made myself when first starting out the blog, to make sure that I did not fall into the trap of blogging every single milestone, or rushing for the camera because this moment would make for a perfect entry. I am selfish with these memories right now. I want to just sit and watch Tessa laugh her little ass off and see LB slowly warm up to her. I love my stupid blog, and so I am protective that I do not grow to hate it. I thought that after a year of blogging, I should mention why I have been so quiet lately. I am not quitting, or trying to figure out what it all means. I am just enjoying watching our hard work grow up.

And she is growing up so fast...

I dug around this blog a bunch last week, read old entries and comments and was just floored at the support and love that was sent our way this last year. I had no idea the amount of emotion that was capable of being shared from all over the world simply by reading, writing, and interacting as a community. So I'm saying thank you so very much for all of the time that you gave to this family, and for caring enough to say hi and to read here. This blog became an unexpected spark that kept me running down dreams and was such a source of encouragement to keep going, I can't thank you enough for that. As an update I felt like I should say I am in the midst of a little redesign here, and nearing the end of some new projects that will keep this blog fresh and fun for me to write in for another year to come. Until then...

All the Love in the Universe ~ Me

P.S. I was curious to know after a year of writing here if anyone had a favorite post that stuck with them, if there was a stand out post. So if you think of one, please leave it in the comments.

P.P.S. I just noticed this nomination today. I am not sure who submitted this blog, but thanks a bunch :)

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